Life Without Facebook: The Anti-Social Media Experiment

I've made the choice to attempt life without sociable websites. What that actually means is becoming off Facebook. While I have accounts on Twitter, Google+, and LinkedIn, I seldom go to those websites. However, Facebook differs. For some reason, even when I vow to not see, it pulls me in. Calls to me personally. Compels me to log in and navigate my feed. And yet when I do, more frequently than not I walk away aggravated, not motivated. So why is it that I keep going back? I am not certain, but it is definitely time to measure and reevaluate. I joined Facebook in 2007 to keep your eye on my daughter when she moved away to school. In 2008, like many other small business owners, I began using it to advertise my small business. I started amassing a big friends list, accepting friend requests from everybody who sent me one. For awhile everything was hunky dory. Until it was not anymore. I'm not just certain when things changed, but change they did. Each time I logged on, my feed, inbox, and alarms were bombarded with advertising and marketing. It seemed that a number of the people who desired to be my buddy, actually just wanted another individual to advertise to. Shotgun advertising at it's best. Probably because it had been, and still is for the most part, totally. As soon as I started to comprehend earlier this season that I was more troubled than motivated every time I logged onto Facebook, I made the choice to cut backagain. I pruned my buddies list of over 5000 people I did not understand and retained only friends, family members, and people I've really met or done business with. Problem solved, or so I believed. Yes, it cut down on the majority of the annoying advertising and articles in my feed which I actually did not care about. However, I continued to find myself feeling uncomfortable after spending some time on Facebook. As soon as I asked myself if the time I spent perusing what my buddies were discussing had improved my life at all, more frequently than not the response has been "no." Yes, it is great to find images of my kid and her friends, because she is so far off. But we speak almost daily, and you will find different means to talk about pictures. Yes, I guess it is interesting to find out what old high school buddies do. But frankly, I did not hang out with a lot of these at high school (just understood them) and I have not emailed or picked up the telephone to phone any of them because reconnecting on Facebook. So it begins to feel as though I'm simply being a voyeur in their lives 30 decades later. And, all I could say is, A Facebook stalker isn't who I wish to be! Yes, I guess it is interesting seeing what other buddies or old business acquaintances are around... but much too often I walk out feeling jealous or less-than since they seem to do much better than I am. Or, the articles shout "look at me" and I find myself asking, Why does Facebook appear to bring this out in people? Yes, I enjoy finding fascinating articles, blog articles, videos, and bargains that I would not otherwise know about. But I'm starting to ask myself if simple access to such items is well worth the annoyance Facebook so frequently arouses. I really don't understand why it bothers me so much. Maybe it is tied into my frustration with all the company coaching and achievement business, and all of the research I did when I wrote my own book. I heard a lot when I took a closer look in the business, and possibly I can not unsee what I saw or unlearn what I heard. I also don't like exactly what I see impacts my remarks about other men and women. I find myself judging them based on which they post, bad or good, and deep down which does not feel great. If folks share rants, I find it too easy to jump onto the bandwagon... and I'm trying hard to live from a more favorable outlook vs. whine about things I do not like. Additionally, on more than 1 event, Facebook has come between me and my spouse. Did you know over a third of divorce filings in 2011 included the term Facebook, as reported by a U.K. poll? No, we are not headed for divorce court, but it will make me ask, Do we actually need this impacting our connection? For all these reasons, it is time to pull the plug, at least briefly, and see what happens. I must step away. Not forever, but at least for a moment. I want to experience life with no Facebook. I am sure I will find different means to get the information that is important to me personally. I am able to subscribe to site feeds or email lists. I am able to search Google. And, if I really need to connect with somebody or discover how they are doing, I could take them an email, pick up the telephone, or walk down the street and knock on their door. Why I'm deactivating my own profile instead of only carrying a Facebook holiday. I required a Facebook holiday a couple of months ago. I didn't go on the website for months. And life has been better. But finally Facebook started calling me back. I thought, Oh, I'll only check in once daily. That lasted for a brief while, and before I knew it, I had been back to regular checking, along with my frustrations were once more climbing.